I spent a week away in California. The house was empty half of the time, but for some reason it looks like a Tasmanian devil came through it, and now I am playing catch up while the school year started. Once again, it feels like things just don’t get done if I am not around. 

I had a moment on the plane ride home and tried to just get it off my chest before I had to come back to Florida. I was going to take a week off from writing, but there is so much on my mind that I need to let it out. I also need to get new glasses. I have been typing sort of blind all week.

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How do you communicate when you can’t communicate? I felt like leaving this sentence here and shutting down the computer. But, really. How do you do it? The one thing I love about poetry is that it leaves room for interpretation. In a way, it’s pretty much like a piece of art. It will either cause writer and reader to connect through a shared experience or it will give someone a way to interpret the concept in a way that fits their own personal situation at that moment. It could also become a skip-it kind of moment. I’ll return when it resonates. It’s really a beautiful thing.

Nonetheless, sometimes you just need to be direct. Straight up: “Hi, how are you?” Type of scenario. This feels like an opening for a post about relationships. I have been avoiding writing about it until my final situation is final. Sometimes it feels like it is forcing its way out though. Like right now. 

As you can tell, there is a lot of “I feel” in this post already. It’s going to keep happening because I am feeling a lot of things at the same time. Confusion, hesitation, excitement, anticipation, relief, worry, hope… I am trying not to dwell on things and just take them as they come. It is my ultimate goal lately: sovereignty. There is something to be learned from silence, because silence doesn’t really exist. Ask John Cage. 

The point is, subtext is great. I love it – for real. I value my privacy like it’s gold. I think that is why art in general is so special to me. But, sometimes I just want to pick up the phone and ask: Is this real? 

Should I end this post here? 

Last night, a song came to my mind. It’s called Closer ft. Mahalia & Paul Blanco, by RM. Somehow, it felt like a prophecy. The interesting thing is that it ends with: Stay where you are. And, in a weird way, it ties back to my concept of arrival. So I am staying where I am right now. Life is becoming fun again. Shared is better, but if there’s gon’be no take two, just leave your message after the beep. lol